Bo-chup

Before I was a parent, I was very determined to be a "relaxed mother". I was pretty stuck on, you know, not becoming one of those screaming women on the MRT with two kids in tow, unhappy and stressed and anxious. I wanted to be more ang-moh and carefree in my parenting mentality- the kind that lets one's kid roll around in the mud and chew grass. The kind that takes it easy.

Then I became a mother. And my fancy vision of myself as a bo-chup mom got shot to bits.

I could say it was part due to Eva's fussy, colicky nature (more on that in another post), and in part due to my perfectionistic personality that was bound to emerge, but whatever the case, I became as anxious as a wound up bird. My first few weeks as a parent were filled with constant worrying, questioning and overall paranoia. Will I hurt her if I do X/Y/Z? Is she getting enough milk? Why is she fussing? What is that spot on her cheek/butt/arm? Is she too cold/hot? Should I be doing this or that?

Etcetera.

As a very wise woman once said, "I was an expert on kids until I had my own".

So I'm not the relaxed kind after all, at least not yet. But I do think I'm pretty bo-chup on one thing: keeping track of Eva's developmental milestones.

Take the flip for example. I had observed that at 16 weeks she had somewhat mastered flipping from back to front, with some assistance. A couple of days after that she managed to get the hang of it pretty well. And then a few days before her 4th month birthday (and I have no recollection of the date) she figured how to flip from front to back, and then there was absolutely no stopping her. It was flip, flip and flip every time she was put on a flat surface. As a result I have one hyperactive girl who rolls non-stop off beds and changing tables and who cannot be left unsupervised- not one minute.

You tell me, how to relax like that?

If I am bo-chup about her motor development, it might be because Eva certainly isn't. In fact, she is very kan cheong and super 'on' about mastering whatever is next. The flip, for example, was preceded by lots of twisting, grunting and vigorous kicking. Next up for the little one: sitting. She loves to sit (assisted of course) and is now taking every opportunity to raise her upper body. Gee, I wonder where all this Type A-ness comes from?